("WELL DONE PATRON” is a short-short story about going to extremes over small matters. Ostensibly a short-short story, we can also see it as a kind of skit that you can perform with your friends in the comfort of your home.
Choose your role with wisdom.
WELL DONE PATRON
“What does a guy have to do to get a little service around here ?!” Todd said in a rather loud voice. Not quite a yell, but up there. Staff lazed about their work of cleaning tables, taking orders and bringing food, paying no attention to Todd’s irritation.
Isabelle shushed him: “We’ll wait just like everybody else.”
The line-up was twenty people long.
“They can fend for themselves, but we have to stand up for what we believe in. We have lives to live. I’m not gonna spend the rest of my life in this fucking line-up !! Just wait here.” Todd stormed off into the outside world.
Isabelle smiled at the people around her.
Ten minutes later, he came back into the restaurant with a jerry can of gasoline.
“Let it be known that my actions are motivated out of complete dissatisfaction with the abysmal service at this restaurant which has degraded us and robbed us of our humanity. May my actions aid in the betterment of others lives. May my sacrifice lead to hope.” He sat at the front of the line-up and started dousing himself in gasoline.
Isabelle laughed uncomfortably. “He gets this way from time to time,” she said to the couple standing next to her.
Sunshine suddenly poured in through the dirty windows of the restaurant whose name was cast in a shadow over Todd’s gasoline soaked lap.